Wednesday, March 11, 2009

An open letter to Rihanna

Rihanna. Honey. Chris Brown beat you. He made your face look like a peach that had been thrown down stairs. Maybe you need to take a break and testify at his hearing before you start going on vacation with him.

Hooking up with that ape again is stupid and dangerous. It’s a hazard to your health and it sends a message to women everywhere that it’s OK to go back to moronic cavemen who beat them. It’s not OK. It’s wrong. It’s as wrong as drunk driving or huffing spray paint and then operating a forklift.

Tell you what. I’ll send him a T-shirt with the police photo of your beaten face on it. Make him wear it every time you’re with him, so you can get a good look at him and what he did to you. (And what he will do again.)

Have him wear it in the recording studio where you’re recording a duet with him for his new album.

I hope your face isn’t the percussion instrument for the song.

Watch Oprah on Thursday the 12th. She's talking to you.

Wake up, Rihanna. You deserve better, and he deserves time in jail.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Hey...I've never had ONE forklift accident. Not one.

It's true what you said about Rihanna, though.