Happy HolO'Days!

Happy Holidays O’Dayers!

From all the e-mails I’ve been getting from you I can tell it’s been an interesting season for all of us! There are so many parties and functions to attend, and each one is special in its own way.

I recently attended a Christmas party/reunion for those of us who were either incarcerated in or worked at the Lady Bird Johnson Correctional Facility for Criminal Women.

Let’s face it, if you’ve been in prison and you show up at a reunion you’re there for one of two reasons. You either want to share with folks how great you’re doing and celebrate the spirit of the season or you want to steal stuff from the coatroom.

At our gathering many of my “prison sisters” were a breath of fresh air, women who are now holding jobs, improving their lives, and contributing to society in a positive way. Evie-Marie even had her teeth fixed! (You go, girl!)

The folks who weren’t doing so hot were the former facility officers and prison guards.

Back when we were prisoners, our captors seemed to have their lives together. After all, they were working, they owned homes with above ground pools and they had barbecues on weekends. They seemed to be living life to its fullest because they were not living behind bars. Now I realize that just isn’t true.

Turns out the guards were busy thinking that everyone else’s life was better. They were waiting for life to come to them. And today they are in the exact same place -- waiting for life to come to them. Watching those guards drain cheap beer after cheap beer and listening to them complain about their extremely comfortable, ordinary lives I wanted to give them a one-way ticket to Zimbabwe.

People, we turn on the faucet and have fresh water. We flick a switch and lights turn on. While we all have our own sorrows, we’re really doing pretty well. Complaining about wanting new carpet or gaining five pounds just doesn’t make sense in the long run.

So as we hurtle into the New Year let’s take a moment to see how good we’ve got it. With discipline, hard work and a can-do attitude we will take ourselves further. But let's start that hard journey by being grateful for what we have right now.

E-mail me at PowerofSandra@aol.com

PS -- A special shout out to the folks who completed the Four Day Bailout at O'Day Camp. It was a heck of a long, cold weekend! Kudos to all of you!

Fix Yourself Four-Day Bailout!

Dear Sandra,

I work at Citibank. For now anyway. I’m pretty sure I’m going to be laid off any minute now. They are literally stacking empty boxes in the hallways for people to pack up all their stuff! What am I going to do? I’m so mad at all the fat cats who are responsible for this. What am I gonna do next?!

-- Vexed in the Citi

Excellent question, Vexed. What are you going to do? Seems everybody is jumping into the “New Great Depression Game.” Even the actors want to go on strike! Why let poverty be the domain of the Wall Street wealthy?

What does one do when stock values plummet, unemployment zooms and recession looms?

You change your life, that’s what you do.

It’s time to take a good, long look at ourselves and ask, “How did we get here at the bottom of this well?” Sure we can point fingers and blame -- but who elected those officials? Who threw their money at financial advisers and didn’t keep track of what was going on? Who bought big fat trucks and cars and houses that they couldn’t afford? That would be us.

It’s time to get out of the “Blame Game.” It’s time to start fixing things, and we need to start with ourselves.

For a limited time I’m offering a no-frills “Fix Yourself Four-Day Bailout!” at O’Day Camp. It’s time to strip your comfort level down to zero and see what you’re really made of. It won’t be fun and it won’t be pretty. But once you experience how lack of heat can turn into abundance of heart -- you’ll know that this lean time of economic recession does not mean a time of emotional depression.

With my guidance you will rise like a Phoenix -- while raking and burning leaves on my 18 acre compound in upstate New York. And that’s just the beginning.

Teamwork-building fire walks will test you beyond any previous “work and finance related” challenge you have ever faced. And my “cross the freezing river” exercise will raise your personal awareness to a level beyond your expectations.

Ever caught a wild duck with your bare hands and eaten it for lunch? You will. My O’Day Transformation Techniques employ grueling assignments that will take you beyond your limited expectations of yourself. I will guide you to transcend any challenge that currently stands between you and the fulfillment of your highest aspirations.

You're stronger than you think. And I’m tougher, more resourceful, and more tuned in to what you need than you are. I’ll be there with support, encouragement, and inspiration. This will be the first step in a journey that will continue for the rest of your life.

Together we’ll make these lean times leaner and meaner. And by leaner and meaner I mean more inspiring. Sign up at www.sandraoday.com.

Change

Well, at some point tonight we will have a new president. (Hopefully.) Being a felon, and still on parole, I am apparently not allowed to vote. This discovery made me understandably furious when I went to my polling place at 7 AM and was loudly rebuked by the facially scarred woman with the speech impediment who screamed for the benefit of the hundreds of people in line behind me, "You can'th vote. You're a cwiminawl!" (Former criminal, thank you Scar Face.)

But instead of throwing things at her, as I so deeply wished to do, I went out and took three extra anger management classes, a yoga class, ran five miles and told the kid at Starbucks that I had gone to vote (I did go) so I could get my free coffee. Decaf.

While I can't vote to make Change happen for our country, I did make Change happen for myself, in my personal life. I did not attack the disfigured volunteer and wreck her pathetic face further. Instead, I worked out my aggression in a healthy way. And I ordered a decaf instead of a regular coffee. For Sandra O'Day, that's a pretty good start at real Change.

So, I have to ask you, people -- now that all the hype of "Change, Change, Change" will be quieting down, will you continue to Change? Or will you go back to being uninformed lemmings who let the newscasters and your neighbors tell you what to think? Will you go back to gorging yourself on cheese-stuffed crusts while popping pills to lower your cholesterol? Will you go back to watching junk on TV and complaining that you're gaining weight because you spend too much time on your patootie?

Or will you really do it this time? People, you don't have to wait until the New Year to start over. Do it now. CHANGE.

E-mail me at PowerofSandra@aol.com and tell me what you want to work on. Together we’ll make a plan for you, a rigorous program of transformation. Let's put you on the true path to Powerful Positive Change. You can do it. I'll make you do it.

PowerofSandra@aol.com

God Is Going To Get You, O'Day

Oh, how I love the hate mail from the religious fanatics. This is from someone who wouldn't sign her name, but her e-mail address pretty much gives it away. So clever these people! I'm only publishing part of the e-mail, because it was so poorly written it looked as if it had been dictated to a special-needs second grader. Here's part of the thoughtful message from Mary:

You are a heathen and will be dammed to eternal hell. God will strike you down this week -- god will strike you down.
-Christian Soldier

OK, first of all, you forgot to capitalize your fictional friend's name the second time you used it -- and that's a big no-no! You should know better, Mary!

God is not going to get me, because he is imaginary. One of his psychotic followers might get me, but that’s not God.

Also, from what I remember from my time in prison -- surrounded by women who were suddenly very interested in the Bible and God -- God is supposed to be forgiving and kind. So it seems you're picking and choosing God to fit your needs, Mary. I think that's a no-no too, somewhere in the religious spin.

If God is as great and strong as you say, he wouldn’t need you to threaten people like me. So back off and let God do his work. You Psycho God lovers are always screwing things up by harming others in the name of God. Bottom line: Psycho follower is not God. Let God do his work, you do yours. (Like go back to school and learn grammar.) Use that brain God supposedly gave you, instead of leaving the gift in the box.

Onward, Christian Soldier.

Hate Letter From A Palin Lover

Amazingly, the religious fanatics continue to send me e-mail. These people think if you don’t agree with them you are so wrong that you’re going to go to the fictional land of Hell.

I. Am. So. Scared.

An e-mail from Samuel: (Impressive biblical name!)

For you, Sandra.
Samuel's new definition of a Liberal: One who would fear and destroy Sarah Palin.

Wow, Sammy. You are your own dictionary! Very creative. Calm down. She did her winking and aw-shucks-ing on the “debate” and all of you who confuse political leadership with television personality think she did just fine. Obviously you can’t tell the difference between a leader and an episode of The Facts of Life.

The only one who will “destroy” Sarah Palin is Sarah Palin. Her ego is so inflated that she believes she is ready for and deserves the vice presidency. She’s not sure what a vice president does, but she’s pretty sure that Dick Cheney does it the right way -- according to one of her debate “answers.” Doesn’t matter that Cheney frequently steps outside the power permitted him by the constitution, she’s all for it! Lawbreaking? Why not!

Know what, Sammy? I’d like to see her do more interviews, because when people say they’re ready to be a world leader I think they should have to answer actual questions, not just give speeches and avoid debate topics.

I want to see if the candidate is ready, I want to know that the potential world leader knows what she’s talking about.

That’s why the press quizzes and investigates. This quizzing, testing and grilling is not attacking -- it’s part of the process. If you want to lead a major world power you need to be able to discuss foreign and domestic policy without embarrassing yourself.

You feel she’s ready to be the stand-by for a man who won’t release his medical records, who could very well already be dead, or pretty close to it.

I strongly disagree.

I think she needs to study the job description for vice president. I think we need to hear her answer more questions rather than merely pander to the right. I think she needs to figure out how to organize hockey moms at the PTA before she tries to lead countries. I think she shamelessly looks for opportunities to pass her retarded baby around like a joint at a party so she can get a nice photo-op.

She’s a folksy television personality, not a leader. She makes for a better comedy character on a SNL skit than a candidate. The only one who will destroy Palin is Palin -- unless she falls out of a helicopter while hunting wolves and gets eaten by a polar bear.

Where are we going? Why are we in this hand basket?

Take a good long look at George W’s business past. Really, take 45 minutes and do some homework for yourself.

Google the Texas Rangers baseball team and Harkin Energy. Google it and read. Do some work for yourself and stop waiting for pundits to tell you how to think. Do the hard work, people!

WAKE UP.

Bottom line: George W. is recidivate in plundering public assets for personal gain. This time personal gain is purely one of hubris: he is most concerned in how he will look in the history books. I hope he will go down like Hoover -- sucking the whole way.

Today George W., who deregulated banking, which allowed this horrendous financially fatal event to happen, now wants us to bail his rich, old white ass out. Again.

He wants the public, Main Street, to bail out Wall Street. He wants the people who make less than 250 thousand dollars a year to bail out the Wall Street people who make well over 250 thousand a year, which doesn’t include their bonuses. (Wall Street bonuses are about 3 or 5 times what you make in a year. Really.)

We have to bail them out or we’re all screwed.

We are “Main Street.” They are “Wall Street”. And we have to bail them out to save ourselves.

So, if we are “Regular” Americans on Main Street, who are the “Non-Regular” people on Wall Street?

Are Wall Street people Super-Americans? Better Americans? I’ll tell you who they are. They’re Rich Protected Americans.

They’re the people George W Bush used to cater to.

But now, his Republican cronies are not standing for it anymore. They’re super-pissed, because now they’re dealing with the same idiot the rest of us have been dealing with for the past eight years. He’s now dragged them into the same hole he’s dragged us into. And they don't like the hole! Ohhh, too bad!

Hi! Welcome to the hole we’ve been telling you about for the past eight years! Make yourself comfortable. We’re ready to eat your eyes.

But those rich House Republicans aren’t accustomed to things not going their way. They’re not ready to cut the lines on golden parachutes for Wall Street CEOs and CFOs. They’re not ready to say the people we’re bailing out have to pay us back, because they still have to cater to the rich.

They want US to continue to protect the Rich People on Wall Street who are responsible for this.

But it doesn’t matter.

The common folk will have to bail them out anyway.

Because we always do. Because we are the rank and file regular Americans. And the mistakes of the “Ruling Party” are always taken out on the “Regular” people.

Until the regular people revolt.

Are you ready?
www.sandraoday.com

Voting Reminder -- Take It Off

Hey folks. I'm sure by now that all of you who can vote have registered. Just wanted to remind you that you can't wear any political buttons or t-shirts or any of that stuff to the polls. They will turn you away and you could lose your chance to have your voice heard. So take it off. Take it all off. Then go do your civic duty.

Rock on.

Fundamental Thanks!

Wow, I'm so thankful for our brilliant country. I have so many people to thank!

I’d like to start by thanking George W. Bush for doing the “Fundamentally Republican” thing and making government smaller by taking the horrendous duty of “regulating” banks off the government’s back and allowing banks to regulate themselves. That’s working out really, really well! I’ve lost tens of thousands of dollars! Thank you Republicans! You’re the best.

I’d also like to thank John “Chipmunk Gland” McCain for assuring us that our banking system is “fundamentally” sound. If fundamentally sound means printing more money without any actual value behind it -– he’s right!!! Keep up the good work!

And I’d also like to thank the Christian fundamentalists for being so fundamentally sure that the big, scary, “elite and intelligent” Democrats are going to ruin the country. I have to agree, they sure wouldn’t do as well at driving us into the gutter as the “Fundamentally Correct” Republicans are doing! Great job, Jesus Freaks! Keep up the good work. Keep looking for “enemies” that are “fundamentally” against you. Keep up your witch hunt until we’re all broke and as frightened and panic-stricken as you are. Oh boy, if driving us all to crazed desperation doesn’t turn us all Christian, what will?!

Good work America! Good work!

Letter from Hell!

Sandra O’Day,
Who the hell do you think you are? You don’t believe in God or hell and you openly scorn a Sara Palin who is God’s gift to our liberal burdened country. You are in serious danger of burning in hells eternal fire unless you change your ways. We are watching you!

Wow, thanks no-name! What an intriguing, smart letter. Just what one expects from the conservative right. Who needs extra funding for education? Let’s break that letter down!

Who the hell do you think you are?

I am an ex-con motivational speaker. I also have anger management issues.

You don’t believe in God or hell and you openly scorn a Sara Palin who is God’s gift to our liberal burdened country.

I don’t believe in God, that’s true. But I know sharing the planet with people like you is hell.

I do scorn “a” Sara Palin. She isn’t a gift to anyone except suicidal moose.

As for our liberal-burdened country – I think we need the “burden” of someone like Bill Clinton back in the White House. Remember the national debt when he left office? Oh, right, there was none. It was a surplus.

You are in serious danger of burning in hells eternal fire unless you change your ways.

I’ll be making s’mores and serving Mojitos when you get there. (And you need an apostrophe to make Hell possessive. Hell’s eternal fire.)

We are watching you

You can sign up for an O’Day Workshop and view me up close! I think it would work wonders for you.

Pray Away The Gay with Palin!

The Following from a radical Jesus Freak who claims to be on "O'Day Watch"
My comments follow.

Dear Sandra,
Hey, Finally a cure for being Gay! I know so many people that will benefit from such a program. GOD BLESS this church and Sarah Palin!!! Please pass along to all Gay people you know!

Associated Press:
ANCHORAGE, Alaska — Gov. Sarah Palin's church is promoting a conference that promises to convert gays into heterosexuals through the power of prayer. "You'll be encouraged by the power of God's love and His desire to transform the lives of those impacted by homosexuality," according to the insert in the bulletin of the Wasilla Bible Church, where Palin has prayed for about six years.

Palin's conservative Christian views have energized that part of the GOP electorate, which was lukewarm to John McCain's candidacy before he named her as his vice presidential choice. She is staunchly anti-abortion, opposing exceptions for rape and incest, and opposes gay marriage and spousal rights for gay couples.

Focus on the Family, a national Christian fundamentalist organization, is conducting the "Love Won Out" Conference in Anchorage, about 30 miles from Wasilla. Palin, campaigning with McCain in the Midwest on Friday, has not publicly expressed a view on the so-called "pray away the gay" movement. Larry Kroon, senior pastor at Palin's church, was not available to discuss the matter Friday, said a church worker who declined to give her name. Gay activists in Alaska said Palin has not worked actively against their interests, but early in her administration she supported a bill to overrule a court decision to block state benefits for gay partners of public employees. At the time, less than one-half of 1 percent of state employees had applied for the benefits, which were ordered by a 2005 ruling by the Alaska Supreme Court. Palin reversed her position and vetoed the bill after the state attorney general said it was unconstitutional. But her reluctant support didn't win fans among Alaska's gay population, said Scott Turner, a gay activist in Anchorage. "Less than 1 percent of state employees would even apply for benefits, so why make a big deal out of such a small number?" he said. "I think gay Republicans are going to run away" if Palin supports efforts like the prayers to convert gays, said Wayne Besen, founder of the New York-based Truth Wins Out, a gay rights advocacy group. Besen called on Palin to publicly express her views now that she's a vice presidential nominee."People are looking at Sarah Palin as someone who might feasibly be in the White House," he said.

OK Folks, I do my best not to blow my stack and I try to keep my language clean. But you have got to be fucking kidding me. Gay Republicans? Get out of the “Self-Hate” game! I think Gay Republicans deserve her. But the rest of us don’t.

Sarah Palin, while being a strong speaker with good looks, is a fascist. She believes the war is “Gods Will.” She goes to a church that believes it can turn homosexuals into heterosexuals because they believe homosexuality is "wrong" and that it makes god cry or something. She believes that Christianity is the ONLY religion that is right, when in truth there is something wrong with all fundamentalist religions. What’s wrong with fundamentalist religions? Not the various deities, but their frothing, lunatic followers. Fundamentalists are dangerous crackpots that torture and kill over who is the favorite of some imaginary friend up in the sky.

Fundamentalists do not believe in equality for all, only for those who are a part of their particular smug, blood-drinking religious sect.

Now, I’ve always said I don’t care what you believe. If you pray to a statue of a ceramic cat and that makes you feel good, terrific. Just don’t tell me I have to do it, too. Then we’re fine. But fundamentalists don’t feel that way. You have to do, say and believe like they do or you’re wrong and not worthy of basic protection and equality. They seem to feel that belief is tantamount to behavior. They can do anything they like –- lie, cheat, condemn others, make money off the war and treat the non-believers like crap just because they “believe the right things”.

And for all your Jesus Freaks out there who are on “O’Day Watch” you can stop sending me the “believe in Jesus or you will go to hell e-mails.” The fact that we exist in the same galaxy IS HELL. When I die it will only be better –- because you won’t be there.

And I hope Jesus does come back soon. I really, really do. Because he will kick your smug, righteous asses to the curb and go back to hanging out with prostitutes and lepers, just like he did when he was here last time.

The Blame Game

Hello O’Dayers! The following is an exchange that recently took place on Facebook between my client, Oliver, my former prison mate, Sally and myself.

Oliver hates his parotid gland.

Sally: Oh crap, now I have to go look that one up

Sandra O'Day: A parotid is a big ear gland. One on either side, just like ears. Makes spit or something. Why would one hate it?

Oliver: Because when your bitch of a grandmother forces you to drink soup that you know is too hot 4 years ago which causes scarring once scalded, the glad won't excrete and the saliva backs up causing the gland to inflame. The result is days of discomfort until manually "pressed" when the infectious liquid can seep out and over your teeth. All day. Yum!

Sandra O'Day: Did she pour hot soup down your throat? Or were you merely pandering to shut her trap? Define "forces you to drink soup" for me. Because I think you took action that you're blaming others for. And that's not what we practice at O'Day Sessions, is it Oliver? I hope your saliva fixes up soon.

Oliver: Pandering. Once again Sandra you are correct in your observations. I am lucky to have discovered your teachings in my life. Thank you. I sent the check by the way so they can stop calling now. Thanks :)

I look forward to hearing your stories of immense personal struggle and will continue to inspire you.

For further inspiration visit Sandraoday.com, e-mail me at PowerOfSandra@aol.com, or be my friend on Facebook.

Web Site!

Hey O'Dayers! We're up and running at sandraoday.com!

Become a believer!

Greetings From O’Day Camp!

Wow, it’s a rainy Monday here at O’Day camp, but we had one heck of a weekend. A couple of gals I know from the Lady Bird Johnson Correctional Facility for Criminal Women came up for a visit and we had a great time. We did some walking on hot coals and jumped out of a plane or two! We’re transformed!

On another high note, Ronnie D was visiting and after an intense weekend of self-reflection he finally killed the playground bully -- the one in himself! Great work, Ron.

We’ll be back in the O’Day offices soon, and we can’t wait to hear from you.

--Sandra

I look forward to hearing your stories of immense personal struggle and will continue to inspire you.

Cheap Friend

Dear Sandra,

Last night my friend made me get off the train SEVERAL blocks from where we were going just because he wanted to go to a specific ATM so he wouldn't be charged a fee. I felt like asking him to give me the fee for the inconvenience, not to mention the disregard for my time. "It's only a few blocks," he said. That's not the point! If my friend and I happened to be walking past an ATM and he had to run in and get cash I wouldn't mind at all. But I feel annoyed that I had to waste my time and energy because of a friend's cheapness and poor planning. I had been thoughtful enough to go to a cash machine during my lunch hour.

This had been bugging me all day. Why do friends let me down? Is it wrong of me to feel this way, Sandra?

--Annoyed at Other's Assumptions


Dear AAOA,
Why do friends let you down? Possibly you have higher standards than most people. Maybe you should be more picky about whom you hang out with. Or maybe you just have lousy friends and it’s time to get new ones.

The friend you wrote me about, however, is merely selfish and cheap. If you don't want to be inconvenienced, don't hang out with cheap, self-centered, money-grubbing, penny-pinching people. Unless you feel, in the long run, that that person is "worth" it. In which case you should give him the 2 bucks that he would lose by going to a more convenient ATM so you don't have to walk so far. Or, maybe, you should wear more comfortable shoes.
-Sandra

I look forward to hearing your stories of immense personal struggle and will continue to inspire you.

Top 10 List for Tourists in New York City

As you may know, the O’Day offices are in Midtown Manhattan, right on 42nd Street near the Port Authority, which is North America’s largest bus terminal.

To get to a subway we have to walk across 42nd Street through Times Square -- that section of the city filled with neon signs where they drop the crystal ball every New Year’s Eve.

It’s a busy place packed with tourists. While we love tourists here in New York, sometimes they need a little help. Here are a few pointers for our very welcomed guests:

1) You need to be fit enough to walk at least two miles in order to get around New York. Certainly there are accommodations for people in wheelchairs, but for those of you who are “able-bodied” but who spend most of your time in your hometown sitting in a chair, on a couch, or in your car, you might want to exercise a little before you get here if you don't already. New York is a city of sidewalks and stairs, and most of us walk at least a mile a day just running errands and going to and from the subway. And to get in and out of the subway you’re going to have to go up and down stairs. Several flights of stairs per subway trip.

2) Don’t stop at the top of the subway stairs. There are people behind you. Lots and lots of people behind you. When you stop the entire line of people behind you have to stop, and they will send you waves of hate for slowing them down. Remember, millions of people actually live here and they’re trying to get to work, or get home, or pick up their kids from school, or just get somewhere. Keep moving, and pull over to the side if you need to catch your breath or look at a map.

3) Ask a New Yorker for directions. We really love our city, even when it’s driving us crazy. We like to show off our knowledge. It doesn’t matter if we look cranky or absorbed in thought, ask a New Yorker for directions. (But not if someone is trying to talk on a cell phone. Seriously, that’s just bad manners.) Chances are, when you ask for assistance, the person you ask will know how to help and then two or three other New Yorkers will pipe in with suggestions, and you’ll end up getting great directions plus extra tidbits of advice.

4) It’s a sidewalk. A Side WALK. Sidewalks are like highways here in New York City, you need to keep moving. When you STOP suddenly in the middle of the sidewalk people behind you might walk up your butt or knock you over, and it isn’t anybody’s fault but your own. Those people behind you who do stop in time will send you hate vibes. When you stop suddenly in the middle of a sidewalk here in New York City you create a barrier for the hundreds of people behind you. So if you really need to stop you should pull over to the side, just like you would if you were driving on a highway. If you stop in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk you come off as rude and stupid.

5) Revolving doors are not brain-teasers. There are many revolving doors here in the city and they’re not that hard to figure out. You push on the push bar, and you go through one at a time. If you wedge your patootie in with some stranger in a revolving door you are going to be lectured, at the very least. If you are unsure of how to use a revolving door, best to watch others do it, then try for yourself.

6) Tip. If you go to a restaurant you need to leave the waiter a tip. To calculate the appropriate amount look at your bill, double the amount shown on the tax, and leave it for the waiter. Don’t be cheap.

7) Go to the theater! We have some great shows here, on and off Broadway! Make sure you turn off your cell phone before the show, and never text message during a show. If you see someone texting during a show make sure you tell an usher. Many people who text during a show get arrested and have to spend at least 24 hours lost in the New York judicial system -- and they deserve it! Also, it’s illegal to take photos during a show. Just a head’s up.

8) Don’t stop. When you go through a turnstile, keep moving. When you go through the metro entrance, keep moving. When you enter a building, a museum, a theater, keep moving. Just because you’ve crossed a threshold doesn’t mean there aren’t people behind you. What kind of silly nilly stops in a doorway?! Keep moving!

9) Walking four or five across is a bad idea. We all understand you’re visiting with family and friends, but to walk shoulder to shoulder with all those people is really crazy. And selfish. There is no need to form a slow-moving barrier. Clump it up, and help keep our city moving.

10) Keep Moving. Unless you’re from Mexico City or Hong Kong or an old-world city where people walk rather than drive from strip mall to strip mall, there are a lot more people here than you’re used to. Try to enjoy the hustle and flow. Our city is like a heart, and the people are the blood running through the veins of the city. Don’t be system-threatening plaque that clogs things and causes trouble, get into the music of being a part of our crowd. Don’t stop dancing, go with the flow.

I look forward to hearing your stories of immense personal struggle and will continue to inspire you.

What Gives, O'Day?

Hey Sandra, where have you been? I live in Nebraska and I’m surrounded by idiots all the time. What gives with you? Post something, already.
-Pissy in the Heartland


Hey there Pissy! Thanks for noticing my absence! We’ve had big things going on up at O’Day Camp – stairs being cut into the river bank to help prevent guests from tumbling into the water, we’re having the bathroom in the main camp house redone, and there was a slight issue about me allegedly “violating my parole” by driving out of New York and through New Jersey to get to O’Day Camp – which is in New York State.

But all is fine now. I chatted with my lawyer, managed my temper, and took a yoga class or two. Plus I picked up a few extra anger management classes at The Center for Center. Interesting place, lots of hippies – and it smells like feet. But other than that I had a blast whacking a statue of an elephant with an inflatable bat. Good times!

I look forward to hearing your stories of immense personal struggle and will continue to inspire you.

Attack of the Crazy Woman

I may have mentioned that the O’Day offices are smack in the middle of midtown Manhattan. We're right across from The Port Authority Bus Terminal, a Catholic Church and a halfway house for addicts. The west side of 42nd Street between 8th and 9th is filled with many lovely people who dwell in and among those establishments.

Today, while walking down the west side of 42nd St, I heard a crazy, crazy, crazy woman screaming, “Stay away from me you fucking PSYHCHO!” She was screaming and screeching and throwing bottles. It happens from time to time just outside the halfway house for the criminally idiotic.

I felt bad for the person being screamed at, but I didn’t go back to help because my mother was a raving, skinny lunatic with missing teeth who had frequent rage episodes and I learned early on not to try and make any sense of it, or even attempt any kind of rescue. It only got you a good beating with her hook.

So I’m walking down the street, looking for a cop because you could tell from the sound of things someone was going to get hurt -- when suddenly the scarecrow toothless crazy woman is in MY face screaming, “Stay away from me you fucking PSYHCHO!” And then she spit in my hair.

She. Spit. In. My. Hair.

Luckily, I had just come from meeting my parole officer, who demanded that I continue with my anger management courses.

I unclenched my fists and grabbed my cell phone.

I immediately called 911, as much for her safety as mine, but before I could give my location I saw a cop in the lobby of the Commerce Bank on 42nd and 9th -- ON HIS CELLPHONE.

He was staring out the window right at us and HADN’T SEEN A THING BECAUSE HE WAS CHATTING ON HIS CELL PHONE.

I immediately corrected this situation by dragging him out and leaving him to chase her through traffic while she screamed, threw garbage and spit all over everyone.

I marched myself up to my offices to shower and beat the crap out of a pillow.

I lathered, rinsed and repeated three times. And one of my pillows sustained serious injury. And just as I was toweling my hair, I received a call on my cell phone -- from 911.

911 Operator: Did you place a call regarding a woman creating a dangerous public disturbance?

Sandra O’Day: I did.

911 Operator: The situation is being taken care of, who came to your assistance?

Sandra O’Day: Well, not the cop ON HIS CELLPHONE! I had to pull him out of the bank where he was HIDING FROM THE RAIN and put him on the case. So who helped me?
I HELPED ME.

911 Operator: Are you still on the scene at this time ma’am?

Sandra O’Day: No. I had to run to my office and shampoo crazy lady SPIT out of my hair.

911 Operator: Oh.

Sandra O’Day: When they take her in will they test her for TB?

911 Operator: I don’t know anything about that. But I will pass on the information that the officer was on his cell phone.

I look forward to hearing your stories of immense personal struggle and will continue to inspire you.

Put Your Legs Together

Dear Sandra,
I get so angry when guys sit on the subway with their legs
spread out really wide and don't move to make room when
I sit down. What should I do?

Pissed Off

Pissed,

I know how you feel. Rude people are EVERYWHERE! In the past I would have ripped their nuts off and tossed them onto the tracks for the rodents and vermin to enjoy. Those were the days!

But now, thanks to anger management, I usually just squeeze in next to them and start coughing without covering my mouth. Then I start talking about how my TB meds aren't working. Sometimes I sneeze and get as much spray on them as I can.

And once I even sat down in the guy's lap! I started telling him what I wanted for Christmas! Boy was he freaked out, and his legs snapped together like a nun's in a cathouse.

But it's best not to get violent, because that will get you arrested. (And honey, you don't want to be put into a holding cell in Manhattan. The hookers will steal your cornflakes.) Just remember, it's hot, everyone is in a bad mood, and hitting people will only start a riot. And while it's never too hot to rip a rude person's nuts off -- it is illegal!

I look forward to hearing your stories of immense personal struggle and will continue to inspire you.

Not Managing my Anger Right Now

The O’Day offices are in the heart of midtown Manhattan. It’s convenient, because you can walk to pretty much any subway or bus you would ever need. It’s harrowing, though, because the neighborhood is very congested with aggressive drivers who are in a big hurry to sit in traffic at the Lincoln Tunnel and with buses full of people who want to tour around our city. Our offices are also a stone’s throw from The Port Authority, which is the biggest bus depot in the USA.

Recently I was walking to my office and crossing the street at 9th Avenue and 41st Street. 41st Street is where buses exit the Port Authority and cross 9th Avenue to get to the Lincoln Tunnel. It is also an intersection where people frequently break the “No right hand turn on a red light" law. Sure, they might not have the light, and there might be pedestrians in the way – but it’s more important that they HURRY UP and get to that tunnel so they can bask in the glory of bus fumes and road rage while they rush home to their miserable lives and ugly children.

Luckily, we have a lot more cops out on that corner now, because people keep getting run over in my neighborhood. Because drivers don’t realize that people actually live in my neighborhood and that pedestrians are just as important as drivers from the suburbs. But people who are in a big rush to get back to their lawnmowers and PTA meetings don’t really care about people who live in cities. They think we battle rats using sharpened sticks and duke it out over dumpster scraps. WELL, THEY’RE WRONG!

So I have the green light, and I’m crossing the street on the corner of 41st and 9th Avenue. And a BUS runs the light and almost HITS ME because the driver of the bus was TEXTING! He was TEXTING while DRIVING A BUS.

But there’s a cop on the corner, right? RIGHT! Thank goodness! Someone cares! But wait, what’s this?! THE COP IS TEXTING TOO so he doesn’t see anything. Were they texting each other? Was the bus driver texting, “Ha ha cop, I’m going to sneak past you again today!” and the cop texting, “No way bus driver, I’m gonna bust your ass!”

People, road rage is going to take on whole new proportions if folks don’t get their shit in order, ‘cause I’m mad as hell and I’m not going to take it anymore. Our city is HOT, it’s filled with bus fumes and we sure as hell don’t need “VISITORS” driving like drunken rickshaw pullers all over us.

SO BACK DOWN and mind your manners! WE LIVE HERE. Don’t make us key your cars and push you down the subway stairs.

I look forward to hearing your stories of immense personal struggle and will continue to inspire you.

Lowes of Lloyd

Up at O’Day camp we have a lot of gardening to do. And, wanting to make healthy food for my plants, I was on a search for a composter. If you have a composter you can rake up your old leaves, your grass clippings, your garden scraps and even take vegetable and fruit scraps from your kitchen, put them in the compost container, tumble it regularly, and in about two weeks you have great fertilizing material for your garden.

None of the Mom and Pop stores in the area carry them, because they are too large to keep in stock.

A new Lowes opened up recently in Lloyd, a little town about 20 miles from O’Day Camp. I figured Lowes is always advertising their helpful, friendly and knowledgeable service, so I thought I’d give them a call. Plus I hear the local economy was hoping for a big boost by having the superstore in the area. Lots of people would be employed, and that’s a good thing.

The first time I called I spoke to a man who identified himself as the manager of the garden center. He said I should call back the following week, because he was going to order composters.

I called back the next week and asked a young man in the garden center if the composters had arrived. He asked me to hold, which I did, for eleven minutes. The young man then got back on the line and asked me if composter was a name brand or some kind of a garden tractor. “Do you know what a composter is?” I asked him. “Uhhh. No.”

Now, this usually wouldn’t bother me, but since the guy was working in the garden center and not in window treatments it kind of ticked me off. Especially since I had been on hold for so long.

“May I speak to your manager?" I asked.

I waited another eight minutes, being bounced from one department to another, when a man identifying himself as John from the garden center got on the line. He sounded very much like the manager I had spoken to the previous week.

“Hi, I spoke with the garden manager last week. He said he was ordering some composters and I’d like to pick one up. Could you check and make sure they’ve arrived?”

John put me on hold -- for another 11 minutes. He then got back on the line and told me rather than keep me waiting, he’d call me back with an answer.

He took my number -- and never called me back.

I called back a couple of times over the next two weeks, but no one at Lowes of Lloyd could answer my question as to whether or not the composers had arrived -- or if they had even been ordered.

I ordered my composter online.

I think the local economy is a victim of its residents.

I look forward to hearing your stories of immense personal struggle and will continue to inspire you.

Slinkies

I got an e-mail this morning from a client, and it really tickled my funny bone.

Some people are like Slinkies -- not really good for anything but they bring a smile to your face when pushed down the stairs.

Now, back when I was a criminal, before I had taken 120 hours of anger management courses plus the mandatory refresher course every five months, I was fond of pushing, shoving and punching any idiot who irked me or got in my way. Those were the days!

But of course I've embraced Powerful Positive Change (PPCTM) and have moved into new territory in my life.

These days, when encountering complete retards, I take a deep breath, count to ten -- twice if I have to, and I do my best not to take someone else's rude, stupid behavior personally. Easier said than done! So, as we go into Memorial Day weekend, let's keep our ire in check as our cities are invaded by slow-moving, slack-jawed tourists and as we sit on the highway like it's some kind of parking lot.

Take a deep breath, count to ten, and think of those slinkies!

I look forward to hearing your stories of immense personal struggle, and will continue to inspire you.

He Says The UHO Is Not A Scam

On Monday March 24 I posted a diatribe entitled, “Mr. Hobo The Selfish Bum from The United Homeless Organization.” In that post I called the UHO a scam.

I later received this e-mail from Vonte Vakel Johnson, UHO worker ID# 2747. (Please read the March 24 post and Vonte's very eye-opening and enlightening response to how the UHO is supposed to work.)

Sometimes, in order to improve ourselves, we have to be willing to be wrong. And sometimes we have to sit down and eat a plate of crow. I am doing that right now, and I hope you will have a bite or two with me. A bite of SCAM crow!

Thank you for your e-mail Vonte. I wish you all the best. It's nice to find someone else who is also on the bumpy road to self improvement.

E-mail From Vonte:

I responded to your observation of that uho worker. I beleive in self help only if you are willing to upgade your self. Like i said in your blogger site sandraoday.blogspot.com. I'm a uho worker. if there is no improvement on the part of the worker than and only than is it a F**KING scam, and that is coming from a UHO worker who actually talks with homeless and previously homeless people, AND works the tables.

I'm a worker that is geting back up on my feet. UHO is not long term employment. It is to get us up from the street back into main stream society. If the worker doesn't want to upgrade themselves, DON'T GIVE THAT F**KER S**T. I sure h*ll wouldn't. time and money are one in the same, and if i don't have time to waste; what does that tell you about my money? I work the tables to get enough money to take care of my basic need and to save enough to fully enter back into mainstream society. currently i'm making progress in entering in to mainstream society.

This organization was designed as a self help program and a first step program. if the worker doesn't want to take the steps to remedy his situation, THEN F**K HIM/HER. don't hinder my goals in upgrading myself. I don't have time for BULLS**T when it comes to improving my situation for the better. If an A**HOLE was to F**K up there life, let them go somewhere where they can facility there F**KED UP behavior. Don't facilitate that S**T in a organization that's helping me get up on my feet. I don't blame you for calling it a scam, i'd call it a scam also if i didn't see any improvement on the part of the worker.

It's A**HOLES like "Mr. Hobo the Self Bum" who F**K it up for workers like me who want to change there life for the better. My table is located on 58thstreet and 5th avenue. my name is vonte vakel johnson and my email is vontevakeljohnson@gmail.com and vontevakeljohnson@yahoo.com

please feel free to send you praise and/or critisizmes to my email
or come the the location i'm at to scream at me and/or curse me out. this I'll gladly accept with a humble and meek spirit. and on this note i bid you adui.

sincerly your's

vonte vakel johnson
UHO worker ID# 2747

I look forward to hearing your stories of immense personal struggle, and will continue to inspire you .

Ziggy the Cat

I had the luxury of spending the past two weeks up at O’Day Camp. O’Day Camp is a former migrant worker compound that we’re turning into a retreat for my workshops and intensive one on-one-power sessions.

Camp is beautiful in May -- the birds chirp, the flowers bloom and the river is usually non-threatening. We have all kinds of critters zooming around the yard -- chipmunks, bats, goldfinches, even an opossum or two.

Ziggy, our camp cat, loves to sit in the window and watch all the action. He sits up straight and makes all kinds of nutty sounds. He chatters and shakes and cries – like he’s just dying to get outside and kill something. Like he has to get outside really, really bad. Like if he doesn’t get out there he’ll go crazy! So I take him outside. And what does he do? Chase birds? Hunt mice?

No.

He panics. Sometimes he frantically rushes from one green patch of grass to another, chomping like he’s a grazing goat. Then he starts getting spooked by everything, the chirp of a bird or a car door slamming two miles away -- he has a total freak out and runs to the porch and cries to be let back inside. Once back in the house, he cries and yearns to be back outside with the birds.

I think Ziggy likes wanting the birds more than being in a position where he can actually catch them. I think a lot of people are like that, too. They’d rather cry over dreams that didn’t come true rather than hunt them down and tear them to into something new. Those are frightened, lazy people. You might even be one of them.

But you don’t have to be.

I challenge you to move forward through lazy fear into active fear. I challenge you to apply a little determination and a lot of imagination to what your life can become. I believe, through reading my blog and buying my books and signing up for O’Day Camp workshops you could break through your lazy fear to a whole new level of active fear. And, between you and me, active fear is a more fascinating more enjoyable level of fear.

I look forward to hearing your stories of immense personal struggle, and will continue to inspire you .

It's Got Nothing To Do With You

Here’s something you hear in New York frequently, “It’s got nothing to do with you.” You hear it on the street all the time, especially from people screaming on their cell phones.

But there is terrific truth to the phrase, “It’s got nothing to do with you.” It just means you shouldn’t take everything so darn personally. Nothing anyone in the world does has anything to do with you. Even if someone is doing something really terrific, or even something really crappy to you at the moment, it has nothing to do with you. What someone else is doing, saying, thinking or feeling has everything to do with them, and nothing to do with you.

Try to take comfort in that.

The one thing we all have in common is that we’re always thinking of ourselves. Our actions, viewpoints and words have everything in the world to do with us and what we want and how we want others to see us.

It has nothing to do with you. And that’s a good thing.

I look forward to hearing your stories of immense personal struggle, and will continue to inspire you .

E-mail Sandra at PowerofSandra@aol.com

Treat Yourself

Oh, I just worked really hard today ...

Oh, my boss was such a hard-nose today ...

My kids are driving me nuts ...

I am so completely stressed out ...

I deserve a treat! A cookie. A box of candy-covered popcorn. A mocha-frappuccino hazelnut vanilla bean latte with whipped-cream and caramel butterscotch sauce on it.

People, we all deserve treats, but that doesn’t mean we should have them.

Oh, but my day was so hard. I’ll feel deprived if I don’t indulge!

Oh, you’ll feel deprived like all those people who don’t live in the top 1% of wealth in the world? Like those people “over there” who don’t have clean drinking water, let alone butterscotch? You’ll feel deprived like they do, and that would be bad, right?

People, we don’t fill ourselves up with treats to keep ourselves happy. We fill ourselves up with treats to help us maintain distance from reality.

Walk down any Main Street U.S.A. into super-mall America and you’re walking into one of the biggest, most mass-marketed soul pacifier factories in existence. Banners and signs waving in Red White and Blue that read, “Make today special, try a new latte.”

Make today truly special, folks. Don’t buy yourself that treat for a change and see where that takes your imagination. Stop pacifying your spirit, set it on fire.

I look forward to hearing your stories of immense personal struggle, and will continue to inspire you .

Be Yourself

Be who you know you are, not who they say you are.

Lots of my younger clients, most in their early 20s, are immediately flummoxed when I tell them this. Because they don’t know who they are yet. They’re finally out in the big world, finally on their own, but they’ve spent their entire lives up to this point being told what to do, what to believe and how to behave. They’ve never had to figure those things out for themselves.

Those kids are trying to run forward into life but they keep looking back to check to make sure they’re doing OK. To see if they’re doing it “right.” To keep their eyes on the shore of approval.

Set sail, my friends. You’re never the same person when you journey and then return home. Go on the journey, and stop checking the horizon.

And for the rest of us setting sail on yet another adventure in our lives -- don’t worry about who you were yesterday. Stop trying to fix that person in the past. Your life can’t set sail when you’re dragging an anchor around. Cut yourself free and enjoy the ride.

I look forward to hearing your stories of immense personal struggle, and will continue to inspire you .

The United Homeless Organization is a SCAM

Last week I was walking down the street past this guy who was soliciting money for The United Homeless Organization. (Google it, folks. It’s a scam.) The guy was sitting beside one of those giant water cooler water bottles begging for change “for the homeless”. I walked by with my coffee from Starbucks, a short coffee, which costs a $1.73, and this glorified beggar starts heckling me, ”Come on lady, seriously? You’ve got five bucks for a coffee from Starbucks but you can’t donate to the homeless?”

Not a good move on his part.

1) The United Homeless Organization keeps only $15 of the money each “volunteer” begs. The “volunteer” keeps the rest.

2) I donate to the Coalition For The Homeless, an actual charity that helps homeless people. I donate by writing a large check and not by throwing a hand full of pennies in a stolen water cooler bottle.

3) I am able to donate because I WORK a JOB. I don’t beg on a corner and ask for chump change. But then again, this guy is clearly a still-practicing bum, as I witnessed when one person was walking by and Mr. Hobo said, “If you’re not going to help the homeless can you at least donate a cigarette to me?”

4) Cigarettes are $7.50 a pack in Manhattan. But the bum didn’t harsh on the cigarette-giver for spending that money on smokes. I guess if I had brought Mr. Hobo a cappuccino he wouldn’t worry about how much I spent on my coffee and not on his “charity work”. (The primary charity clearly being himself.)

5) Sitting on the corner begging for change while wearing a red UHO T-shirt does not make it a higher-level of begging. It is still begging, especially when you’re begging for cigarettes.

6) The hobo told me, “I’m the top-earner for UHO.” No, dude, you give the UHO $15 so you can legally beg. You’re the top earner for YOU, hobo, not for the organization. You are a bum.

7) There are better ways to separate people from their money than by insulting their choice of coffee. We get insults for free here in New York City.

8) After being heckled by Mr. Hobo, a nice young guy came up to me and said, “That was really rude of him. There’s nothing wrong with drinking Starbuck’s coffee. Starbucks is the best place I’ve ever worked. I love it there. The company donates to lots of charities, too.”

9) Not every homeless person is a bum, but every free-loading bum is a low-life who is too lazy to keep a job.

And, after laying out my opinions for “Mr. Hobo the selfish bum” I realized:

10) You don’t need to explain yourself to a bum. He doesn’t care about you. He just wants your money.

I look forward to hearing your stories of immense personal struggle, and will continue to inspire you .

When/Then Syndrome

I’ve met so many people who say things like, "When I lose 15 pounds then I’ll buy new clothes and start going to the gym." Or, "When I feel better about my stunted personality then I’ll start socializing." "When I get that embarrassing hair removed then I’ll start dating."

So, let me get this straight. You’re not going to do what you really need to do NOW until you get some lame, speed-bump excuse done first? That's crazy talk! People, don't create road blocks for yourself. There is no need to do that! Start with the big stuff and do all the work. Dive in. No more namby-pamby “let me stick my toe in the water” first.

Get out of the When/Then game, People. It's all here and now.


I look forward to hearing your stories of immense personal struggle, and will continue to inspire you .

Loser Criminal

I got the following e-mail at PowerofSandra@aol.com, an e-mail address for you, my readers, to write in and touch base.

However, this e-mail is from some scam artist who claims to be "working" in London as a banker. I hope this person ends up spending as much time in prison as I did, if not more.

His ‘letter’ is in italics, my responses to his letter are in bold.

Allied Irish Bank Ltd,
14-16 Cockspur Street,
London , SW1Y 5BL.

Dear Friend,

Friend? Seriously? Who are you?

I was reading through your profile on the internet and found it interesting.

I bet you did.

Be so kind to contact me at your earliest convenient for a possible business deal involving money transfer of about £14.5 Million.

I don’t know who you are, but I won’t be contacting you at my earliest convenient. You are a criminal, and you are high on crack.

I am Roland Brown presently in London working as an investment consultant with the above bank at their London office. I am poised to work this deal out if we can do business. As at this moment, I am constrained to issue more details about this business until your response is received.

Oh, you’re Roland Brown and you are constrained to issue more details? I think you should be restrained with handcuffs and put in a hole with snakes.

As we have not met before, I will give you every details you need to know about me as we progress with the business.

I'm pretty sure I know every details I need to know about you. You are a criminal and your English is terrible.

I thank you for spearing moments of your very busy schedules to read my proposal. Send your response to my email address.:invest_2200@yahoo.com.hk

Thank you for spearing moments of your very poor English. Nice try, you loser criminal.

Thank you for your time and attention.

Thanks for reminding me of why I hated jail – because criminals are stupid, lazy crack heads.

Warmest regards,

Roland Brown

Kiss my butt,

Sandra O’Day

Fresh Ground Coffee

Due to flood conditions up at O’Day Camp, we are republishing notes that were run earlier this year.

The following conversation took place while I was visiting a friend in her very fancy, extremely expensive Manhattan apartment.

Sandra O’Day : Mmmm. That coffee smells really great, Doris!

Doris the Whiner: It better! It’s a pain in the butt to make.

Sandra O’Day: How so?

Doris the Whiner: Well, I really like super-fresh coffee. So I have to measure the beans, put them in the grinder, grind them, clean the grinder, boil the water, pour the water by hand through the filter bit-by-bit to slowly saturate the coffee ... it just takes a really long time!

A quick silence.

Sandra O’Day: Let me get this straight. You’re complaining about pushing a button on a grinder so that electricity, which you and everyone in your entire city has, will grind the expensive, designer coffee beans. Beans that were hand-picked on a treacherous mountainside in the relentless heat by someone in a developing country who has no electricity or running water and is paid a fraction of a penny for her hard work?

More silence.

Doris the Whiner: Cream and sugar?

Sandra O’Day: Black.

I look forward to hearing your stories of immense personal struggle, and will continue to inspire you .

Meow Boom Syndrome

Due to flood conditions up at O’Day Camp, we are republishing notes that were run earlier this year.

Religion is not prevention.

Some people think that subscribing to religion helps prevent bad things from happening. Like Jesus and the other deities are some sort of good luck charm. Jesus is not a rabbit's foot, people.

Here’s a fact: Bad things are going to happen in your life.

Here’s another fact: Good things are going to happen in your life.

Now, which fact do you focus on?

Most people, not surprisingly but sadly, focus on the fact that bad things are going to happen. They assume the bad things will outweigh the good things, so they focus on the bad things -- bad things that have never even happened!

Why? Why spend so much of your energy creating horrible future scenarios for yourself? Not that I don’t understand the attraction. It’s easy. It makes you feel like you’re being strategic about your future in some way.

Believe me, I used to dwell in the land of the negative future. Nobody, and I mean nobody, could spin a negative thought quicker than I could. My therapist in prison was amazed! Apparently it takes most people three or four thoughts to spin into complete despair and horror, but not me! My imagination could go from adopting a kitten to complete world annihilation in one thought. ONE thought!

I call this MEOW BOOM! Syndrome.

Every time my old, negative way of thinking starts to creep in I yell “MEOW BOOM” at the top of my lungs –- no matter where I am. And it makes me laugh and realize how silly I’m being.

Let’s all give our fears a good poke through their cage! Next time we are overcome by our fearful imagination we’ll cut it down to size by shouting at the top of our lungs, “MEOW BOOM!”

I know, it seems silly. And some of you still aren’t ready to cut loose that fear and worry. Some of you actually believe you need that worry -- because you try to use worry as prevention. As in, “If I worry about all the horrible thing that could go wrong I’ll stop those things from happening.” No, you won’t. But you sure will spend a lot of energy focusing on negative things.

Bottom line, you control your imagination, it doesn’t control you. And no matter what, worry is never ever productive.

MEOW BOOM!

I look forward to hearing your stories of immense personal struggle, and will continue to inspire you .

Sympathy For The Devil

There are so many dim-wits out there who don’t understand that other people are just as important as they are. For years I’ve tried to change those mindless masses. I’ve tried to make the world a better place. I used to believe no one was O’Day proof. However, there are some who are so thoughtless, so thick-in-the-head, that I often feel like I’m back in solitary confinement banging my head against the cinderblock wall.

I now know the frustration born-again Christians feel when they realize they will never save anyone but other born again Christians. I understand their aggravation and their aggression. They really, really want the world to believe the same things they do! And, as Sandra O’Day, I can tell you I want the world to behave in a kinder, more thoughtful, more considerate way.

I want people to behave more like I do, just like the born again Christians want people to believe what they believe. (Behavior doesn’t seem to be as important to the born-agains as belief.)

But not everyone can be a born again Christian. And not everyone can behave in a kind and respectful manner -- as I wish the world would do. No, there will always be people who think it’s OK to break the rules, or be mean, or clip their nails in public. And try as I might, some of those people are not going to change. Just because I changed, does not mean they will. I’ve also noticed many of these unbelievably rude people are born again Christians -- and yet I feel their pain. In more ways than one.

I look forward to hearing your stories of immense personal struggle, and will continue to inspire you .

My Big Blue Gun

I really hate people sometimes. It never ceases to amaze me how many rude, disgusting thoughtless people are out there. I used to think those people were just selfish, but then I realized they were merely sloppy and trashy. Too lazy and lacking enough self-awareness to actually be selfish.

I think these etiquette-disabled people should be marked. Physically. That way, unsuspecting people of good manners and conscience could identify them immediately.

Here’s what I propose: a gun that turns people blue. And the blue coloring lasts for at least four days. That way, people who are consistently “blued” will be even more blue than the casual, accidental offender.

Now, I realize that if this dream of marking idiots were to actually happen, I myself could be “blued.” Because, lets face it, even those of us who try really hard to be polite and thoughtful and considerate fail from time to time. We’re all idiots, but we’re not all full-time idiots. That’s why we need the blue gun.

And once we could see those blue people coming a mile away we could all work together to make them more thoughtful members of society.

I look forward to hearing your stories of immense personal struggle, and will continue to inspire you .

The Crap Game

I recently spent some time with some O’Day Seniors. I took some very nice aged Vermont cheddar cheese to one old gal I visit and she says, “I like yellow American cheese. Now that’s good cheese.” I took another elderly fellow a really beautiful apple pie from a local bakery. The old dude goes into his kitchen and comes out with an Entenmann's pie and says to me, “Now this is good pie.”

Orange dairy food product. Gummy assembly line pie filled with ingredients you can’t pronounce. I’ll give it to them. They’re super-old. They can eat all the squeeze cheese and apple goo they want.

But the rest of us need to consider, what kind of crap do we crave? What kind of crap do we shove into our bodies?

Have you ever gotten onto a subway in New York City just as school is being let out? It's like being stampeded by a herd of unhealthy fat kids with McDonald’s wrappers stuck in the corners of their mouths. Fattening themselves up for the pharmaceutical companies so they can make a whole lotta’ dough off of their diabetes drugs and Relacor for stubborn belly fat.

“Oh, but Sandra, fresh vegetables are so hard to find. I’m doing the best I can. I’m stressed out!”

Stressed out? It’s time to stress in folks. Look inside. You can’t make things better by popping a pill when you’re playing the crap game! The pill is just another piece of crap.

Take a good look at what you put into your mouth, people. Ask yourself who benefits. And get out of the CRAP GAME.

I look forward to hearing your stories of immense personal struggle, and will continue to inspire you .

E-mail Sandra at PowerofSandra@aol.com

The God Game

So what’s your plan for your life? Or are you like most people who have no strategy for their future?

“Oh, I’ll just make a wish, toss this penny into the fountain and see what happens.” I’ll tell you what happens. The guy who cleans the fountain cashes in on your wishes.

Or maybe you’re a “go-with-the-flow” type. “Dude, I’ll just see where the river of life takes me.” Dude, the river leads to the ocean. Then what?

Or maybe you’re one of those, “I’m just gonna’ let go and let God,” types. People, I’m all for faith, but if you can’t even be specific about what you want how can you expect your imaginary friend to provide it for you?

My attitude ruffles some feathers. But I don’t really care. I’m not saying it’s wrong for people to believe in outside forces or a “higher power”. I’m relatively OK with that. But I’m not OK with people sloughing their responsibility off on God.

“I didn’t give up, I gave it up to God.” No, you gave up. You failed so you passed the buck to God. That’s not right. If your spine hasn’t been broken then stand up and get back on that horse.

Figure out what you want, make a plan, set some goals and put all your concentration and energy into making that plan happen. If God is a part of your private cheering section, good for you. But you need to believe in yourself first -- do the hard work and listen to your dreams so that you can make a map for your life and create the life you deserve.


I look forward to hearing your stories of immense personal struggle, and will continue to inspire you .

E-mail Sandra @ PowerofSandra@aol.com

Fire!

An e-mail from an O’Dayer:

Dear Sandra,
I am curious about your affinity with fire. Are you attracted to it for it's qualities of purification or do you just like to watch things burn?
Just curious.
-A fan.

Dear Fan,
It’s a combination of both those things. Basically I’m a pyromaniac. The American Heritage Dictionary defines pyromania as, “The irresistible urge to start fires.” And, I have to admit, that’s me all right! But ever since I’ve been released from prison I’ve curbed my love for the burn and I no longer set anything and everything on fire. I have a wonderful fire pit up at O’Day Camp where I do controlled, within legal limits burns. And yes, I even get permits from the town before I light the fire! So, if you have any old papers you’d like to get rid of –- divorce papers, old tax receipts, bankruptcy papers, love letters, pictures of yourself in sixth grade ... sign up for a trip to O’Day Camp and we’ll get rid of those pesky papers once and for all!

You can e-mail me at PowerofSandra@aol.com

I look forward to hearing your stories of immense personal struggle, and will continue to inspire you

Vision Wart

An e-mail from an O’Dayer

Dear Ms. O'Day,

I was at one of your seminars here in LA (you may remember me, I was the one that thought my success was hindered due to the huge wart on my forehead but you told me to look at it as if it's a third eye and imagine that I can see things better, an lo and behold, it worked!) and I just wanted to tell you that this blog is long overdue. Can't tell you how wonderful it is to have daily inspiration from a talented, insightful, pissed-off person like yourself.

Keep up the good work.

Richard P. Johner


Thanks, Richard! Hope that wart/third eye remains fixed on all your goals! Keep up the good work!

E-mail Sandra at PowerofSandra@aol.com

I look forward to hearing your stories of immense personal struggle, and will continue to inspire you .

Snow Plowed

I was up at O’Day camp this weekend and the backwoods dirt road that leads to the compound is covered with dangerous snow and ice. The road should have been plowed, but the winter deal I made with my neighbor down the way, who has a plow on his rusted truck, is not being honored. I know I shouldn’t be surprised, but somehow I believed that by being honest, kind and generous toward him and his scarecrow wife it would somehow, magically, make some kind of a positive difference. It didn’t.

I think I put so much trust in the situation because I was raised in conditions similar to those in which my neighbors now live. I grew up in a burned-out, rented trailer, they live in one now. My parents were toothless and chain-smoked, my neighbors are toothless and chain-smoke. When the door to my parents’ trailer opened, gigantic gin bottles rolled out, in the same way that big, plastic no-name vodka bottles roll out of my neighbors’ trailer. My neighbors burn trash in their yard rather than pay to have it collected, just like my parents did.

I think I’ve been trying a little too hard not to judge a book by its squalor-stained cover. While it’s true that I used to live in similar circumstances, I also ran away from home. I was only 13 when I figured out that anywhere else was better than where I was. My toothless, hillbilly neighbors, however, choose to continuously reside in a trashcan.

Bottom line, just because there are exceptions to the rules here and there, it doesn’t mean you should ignore your instincts.

A person who treats his body, home, family and property like trash isn’t going to treat you any better. And they certainly aren’t going to help you keep your road free of snow and ice. Consider it a lesson we all learned together.

I look forward to hearing your stories of immense personal struggle, and will continue to inspire
you .

Lay Low Dos and Don’ts

How you use a Lay Low is the most important part of having a Lay Low period! Here are a few pointers:

Do study, read and see movies.

Do exercise, even if you don’t feel like it.

Don’t start drinking the moment you wake up in the morning.

Do fill up on good ideas and stories.

Don’t hit people. (A good idea for everyday life, too!)

Do read Sandra O’Day books, and explore the archives of this blog.

Don’t call and/or e-mail people you’re waiting to hear from twice a day to, “see how things are going.”

Do get in touch with old friends and colleagues you haven’t heard from in a while.

Don’t call your crazy ex and stir up trouble because you’re looking for something familiar to do.

Lay Lows are a great time to take stock of the successes you’ve had and think about what you’d like to change in the future -- because folks, that Lay Low is going to end! And when it does your life is going to be wonderfully busy.

So let’s ride this February Lay Low out and get ready for some Powerful Positive Change!

You can e-mail me at PowerofSandra@aol.com

I look forward to hearing your stories of immense personal struggle, and will continue to inspire you .

Lay Low -- Part Three

Wow! Seems like a whole lot of you O'Dayers are in a February Lay Low! Hang in there -- it won't last forever! Here are a few FAQs about Lay Lows:

Q: What is a FAQ?
A: A frequently asked question.

Q: What is a Lay Low?
A: A Lay Low is a period of time when you can’t make anything happen. (Read the two previous posts.)

Q: How long does a Lay Low typically last?
A: On average, two weeks to five months. However, Lay Lows are as varied as the people who experience them. Some Lay Lows may be an intense five days, others may float in and out for a couple of years.

Q: What should I do when I’m in a Lay Low?
A: Relax. Catch up on your reading. Go to the gym. Take a vacation. A Lay Low is a time to rest and fill up on new ideas. Lay Lows are a perfect time to read Sandra O’Day books or invest in an O’Day Workshop.

Q: I’m in the middle of a Lay Low right now and I feel like I’m falling apart. I want to bust out of my skin and run away, but I can’t. Any words of wisdom?
A: Change your you when you can’t change your where.
Q: What does that mean?
A: When you can’t change where you are you can change how you react to where you are.
Q: Can you give me an example?
A: Sure! While I was incarcerated I was sent to solitary confinement and I almost lost my mind. I discovered banging my head against the cement wall wouldn’t change anything, but it would cause hearing loss. Once I adjusted my reaction to where I was, I found a useful way to pass my time. I wrote my first book in solitary, “O’Dayisms.”

You can e-mail me at PowerofSandra@aol.com

I look forward to hearing your stories of immense personal struggle, and will continue to inspire you .

Lay Low -- Part Two

Today we continue our conversation on Lay Lows.

A Lay Low is a period of time when you can’t make anything happen. You’re stuck with being stuck in the dirty muck of right now. And you’ll try to get yourself out, but you can’t. So then you’ll spin your wheels and your mind will try to race ahead to the future! “Oh, the future, just get me out of right now and into the future!” But you can’t, because you’re in a Lay Low.

And when you realize that you’ll have to wait to move forward, that you’re stuck in the now, you’ll start to look back at where you’ve been, and pretty soon you’re trying to rewrite the past. “I should have done this, I could have done that. How do I fix the past?”

You can’t. You can never fix the past. Stop looking behind. You’ll never put your life back in drive when you’re looking in the rearview mirror.

The mire of a Lay Low is a great time to focus. You can prepare. Lay Lows are no fun, but when you’re in one, take advantage of the time. Learn to wait. Learn to rest up. Lay Lows are often the calm before the big, beautiful storm.

More on Lay Lows in the next posting. And if you think you might be in a Lay Low, drop me a line at PowerofSandra@aol.com

I look forward to hearing your stories of immense personal struggle, and will continue to inspire you .

Lay Low -- Part One

An e-mail from an O-Dayer:

Dear Sandra,
I hate February. It’s dark and gloomy, cold and rainy – and nothing is happening for me business-wise. I didn’t get a raise or a bump in my bonus this year, but at least I wasn’t laid off like half the people at my firm. Every new project I try to initiate gets crushed by the higher-ups. And to top it all off, I’m single and I’ll have to endure Valentine’s Day alone next week. Any advice to help me out of this funk?
-Funky Biz Dude

Dear Funky,
Usually I’d lambaste you for being a complainer, but I think it’s more than that. I think you’re in a Lay Low.

A Lay Low is a period of time where no matter what you try, you can’t make anything happen. You can make all the right moves, you can do everything perfectly right, and nothing will seem to move forward. You’re like a kitten mewing at a door or a baby screaming in the crib. All the wind in your body won’t change the way things are.

Here’s the number one thing to remember about a Lay Low -- at some point it will end. Nothing lasts forever, not even a Lay Low.

I’m going to spend the next few postings going over the ins and outs of Lay Lows. In the meantime, if you think you might be in the middle of a Lay Low like our friend Funky, drop me a line.

You can e-mail me at PowerofSandra@aol.com

I look forward to hearing your stories of immense personal struggle, and will continue to inspire you .

Slick as Goose Poop

There are a whole lot of geese up at O’Day Camp right now. Hundreds of them. And seeing all of them reminded me of a saying from my criminal days. (And please pardon the profanity!) “That Sandra O’Day is as slick as goose shit.” Back then, it was a good thing. It meant that I was a very crafty criminal and I was hard to catch. But now, as a former criminal who owns land covered with geese, it means something entirely different. It now serves as a warning. Now it means “watch where you walk,” because goose poop IS very slick – and you could end up in the river.

I look forward to hearing your stories of immense personal struggle, and will continue to inspire you .

Steak for Sale

True Story

Last night I was approached on a street corner by a heavyset, scrappy-looking woman. The following conversation took place:

Scrappy Lady: Excuse me. I just got out of rehab. Do you have a cigarette?

Sandra O’Day: No, I don’t.

Silence.

Scrappy Lady: Do you eat steak?

Sandra O’Day: Steak?

Scrappy Lady: Yes. Do you eat steak?

Sandra O’Day: Not often.

Scrappy Lady: Oh, ‘cause I got these two steaks in this bag here, and I want to sell them. They’re very nice steaks.

She shows me the steaks.

Scrappy Lady: I lifted them from the store.

Sandra O’Day: Oh.

Silence.

Scrappy Lady: (In a sad voice.) Don’t judge me.

Sandra O'Day: I wouldn’t.

Scrappy Lady: I can tell that by looking at you! You look like you understand. Like you’ve been in trouble before.

Sandra O’Day: I have. I’m still on parole.

Silence.

Scrappy Lady & Sandra O’Day: Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!

Laughter dies down.

Scrappy Lady: Know where I might be able to sell these steaks?

Sandra O’Day: I’d try outside of the bar around the corner. Lots of smokers out there who look like they enjoy steak.

Scrappy Lady: Yeah, good idea. It’s a rough bar.

Sandra O’Day: Goodnight. Good luck with your rehab.

Scrappy Lady: Good luck with your parole! Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!

I look forward to hearing your stories of immense personal struggle, and will continue to inspire you.

The Worry Game

Worry is pointless. Even crazy fundamentalists of any stripe will tell you that. “Let go and let God,” they say. Some people whisper to little worry dolls at night, “Sorry to burden you, little piece of straw wearing clothes. But thanks!” And for them, worrying is done! I say, heck, if it works for you use it. If you need to stick pins in a pillow stuffed with lavender or light Glade Scented Candles or have a scotch while you soak in a hot tub of bubble bath crying and listening to Pasty Cline -- that’s great. If it works, good for you! Just don’t waste your time trying to convince me your way is the only way. There is more than one way to ditch worry.

Worry will never, ever work in a positive way.

You know what you’re trying to do when you worry? Prevent bad things from happening. But you can’t. So don’t try. Worry is pointless.

If you worry over what could be, trying to imagine what might happen, you are not thinking about the future. You are writing a play. A worry play. Stop. It’s not interesting, useful or productive.

Get out of the worry game.


I look forward to hearing your stories of immense personal struggle, and will continue to inspire you .

The Probably People

If someone says to you, “I probably shouldn’t tell you this ...” they “probably” shouldn’t. People who engage in this kind of manipulative gossip need to be rounded up and shipped to their own island where they can torture each other in a “Lord of the Flies” kind of way. Their whispered secrets, nasty rumors and flat-out lies are merely pathetic attempts to puff their egos by deflating someone else’s.

What do the Probably People get out of telling you something they “Probably” shouldn’t? They get the satisfaction of spinning you into the murk of self-doubt. They balloon themselves on smugness with the power of “Probably.” They make themselves feel big by making you feel small.

Don’t have any truck with the “Probably People.” And don’t be one. No one like a gossiping, weasel-faced, back-biting jerk.

I look forward to hearing your stories of immense personal struggle, and will continue to inspire you.

Inspiration Everywhere

I saw this in a children’s joke book I was reading in the O’Day Camp library last weekend:

Q: Where can you always find a helping hand?

A: At the end of your arm.

I look forward to hearing your stories of immense personal struggle, and will continue to inspire you .

You can e-mail me at PowerofSandra@aol.com

E-mail From An O’Dayer

dear sandra oday;
i really like what you are saying....but i really like that you have anger proplems. that i can relate to. in fact when people don't admit this it makes me freaking crazy!! i bet you get me. i bet you're on board. if you are not, to HELL WITH YOU! sorry, i got a little angry.
your new fan,
jerry
www.exploding-noses.com

Thanks for your e-mail Jerry! I enjoy your discoveries as you explore unemployment. Here’s an exercise you might want to try when you feel yourself getting angry: take a deep breath and then count to ten. It has prevented me from violating my parole more than once! I’ve also challenged myself to not use any swear words, and while I don’t always succeed, at least I’m aware that I might be losing my temper when one slips out. Beating the stuffing out of a pillow works, too. Sometimes I even smack a rock with a stick while I scream my head off. And when I really need to let off steam I go on a run up a mountain or take a quick dip in the river up here at O’Day camp. An icy cold dunk in the water will cool anybody off! And whatever I do, I don’t drink and play with guns. (I don't have to learn that lesson more than once!)

I look forward to hearing your stories of immense personal struggle, and will continue to inspire you .

You can e-mail me at PowerofSandra@aol.com